Wednesday, April 26, 2006

A double dose of delinquency; new this week at the buffet…

The Kommandant learns a harsh lesson about schoolyard politics from the Class Of 1984.

And Bunny gets schooled in how not to behave around a nuclear power plant from the Class Of Nuke 'Em High.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Teenage Wolfman meets Teenage Frankenstein meets Teenage Dracula; new this week at the buffet…

If I may revisit a topic from last week, I think the Kommandant has finally kicked his WIP habit. At least temporarily. I'd like to take credit for that but, in truth, it was a dusty VHS tape he unearthed from a box in the basement over the weekend that provided the straw that - finally! - broke the back of this film rut. The offender: Amazon Jail. Trust me, the atrocities suffered by these imprisoned women was nothing compared to the atrocity of sitting through this movie. Watch at your own risk.

As for this week's offerings, we have a double dose of late '50s AIP teen trash, How To Make A Monster and Blood Of Dracula.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Thursday April 13th is Jason's unlucky day…

On this 13th day of the fourth month of 2006: The Year Of The 13ths please join us as we venture back to Crystal Lake a fourth time for the most inappropriately named installment in the series (aside from part 9, Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday) Friday The 13th: The Final Chapter.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Caged birds & fully realized lovedolls; new this week at the buffet...

I don't know about the rest of you but in our recreational movie watching we tend to get into what I call a genre rut - where we watch a whole bunch of similar movies in a row. For reasons unknown to us all, The Kommandant's been on a bit of a WIP kick lately. Subsequently, in the past couple weeks I've seen more braless women and group delousings than I ever thought I would see in my lifetime. And I think I've developed a bit of a crush on Sid Haig. (On an unrelated note, am I the only one who's noticed how much a mid-'70s Haig resembles a current day Santino Rice?)

These genre ruts also seems to reflect what we write about on the site, and to that end one of this week's new additions is the Kommandant's completely biased thoughts on The Big Bird Cage, by far the cream o' the crop of the chicks in chains movies we've watched in this cycle. If you're only going to see one movie featuring forced female imprisonment, sadistic prison guards, stoned revolutionaries, and one really, really tall wooden structure that refines sugar and crushes mouthy slave girls, I highly recommend you make it this one.

Also new to the menu this week - but totally unrelated to the above paragraphs in any way - is the much anticipated (by me anyway) newly released director's cut of Dave Markey's sequel to Desperate Teenage Lovedolls, Lovedolls Superstar Fully Realized.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Lusty ladies & satanic schoolgirls; new this week at the buffet…

I interrupt our regularly scheduled weekly update announcement to bring you the following announcement from our friends at Zombastic Films


This week we finally signed a distribution deal for North America. Image Entertainment is the company that will be releasing DIE YOU ZOMBIE BASTARDS! on DVD.

Image is also the home to the films of Herschell Gordon Lewis, Ed Wood, Mario Bava and Jess Franco as well as the Something Weird, Criterion & Playboy collections. We're simply thrilled to think that DYZB! will be hitting the stores in such esteemed company. We're hoping that the aforementioned hitting of the stores will happen before the end of 2006, but there's no way to tell for sure at this point. Things are certainly moving in the right direction, however. Fingers are crossed. Rest assured that we will keep you posted, O Zombastic Faithful.

Congratulations guys! You totally deserve it.

And now back to our update. Freshly uploaded to the buffet menu this week is an absolutely sacrilicious tale of sin and sisterhood, Don't Deliver Us From Evil, and a double dose of sleazy sexploitation shenanigans, She Mob & Nymphs Anonymous.

Monday, April 03, 2006

The Curse Of Debbie Does Dallas...

As we have already covered many times over, I love a documentary. I didn't necessarily love this particular documentary but I didn't not love it. I suppose you could say I liked it. It definitely had it's plusses and minuses though. On the plus side it had Herschel Savage (who I like for some reason) and interviews with Bill Kelly & Pat Livingstone. (If you read The Other Hollywood you may remember these guys as the main men behind the MIPORN operation. And if you haven't read that book, you really should; it's fantastic.) On the minus side, there was curiously little information disseminated and in the end, I realized I still didn't know what the title was making reference to. Was there a curse? And if so, what was it?

I think part of the filmmakers' thesis is that because Bambi Woods disappeared from the film industry, adult or otherwise, shortly after the film's release, that it "cursed" her career but I don't know; if I was her, I might have gone into hiding too. Just between you, me & the lamppost, Debbie Does Dallas isn't all that great of a movie. When the Kommandant & I watched it (purely for research purposes of course) I remember thinking that she kind of looked like she showed up on set to deliver lunch and wound up accidentally starring in a dirty movie that accidentally ended up being one of the most well known porn films of all time. I will say this much, when I eventually get around to seeing Desperately Seeking Seka there better be a fifty-something Seka by the end of the film.